Challenges

Still scrambling to keep up with the whole “New Year, New You” thing?

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How many blogs, articles, or workshops have you tried that promised you would become the best version of yourself with their easy 5-step program? You probably felt excited and hopeful at first, but then life got in the way. After missing a week or two, you began to doubt yourself and felt deflated, ending up right where you started.

It’s important to know that feeling overwhelmed is normal, and you’re not alone. The people offering these courses often don’t share how many times they failed before succeeding. What you see can make it seem easy, leading you to wonder why you can’t do it too.

As a Health Coach, I help others reach their goals, but I also make mistakes. I know when to take on new challenges and when to stick to my strengths. Missing my own goals helps me relate to others. I prefer to learn from someone who’s been through it and is open about their experiences.

I know that the only way to achieve something different is to change what I’m currently doing. Yes, I understand this isn’t neuroscience, but it is hard. Our brains are wired to make day-to-day routines easy and abbreviated. Doing something different initially takes more time, thought, and grit at times to adhere to it.

The first step is to IDENTIFY what you want. This clarity serves as a guiding star, illuminating the path forward and helping you navigate the complexities of change with confidence. By reflecting on your desires, you can understand the motivations that drive you, allowing you to set focused goals that align with your values. This process empowers you to create a strategic plan for your journey and equips you with resilience to face challenges. Embracing this clarity ensures that each decision aligns with your vision, fostering fulfillment as you progress towards your objectives and enabling adaptability when unexpected opportunities or obstacles arise.

To achieve your goals effectively, it is essential to establish clear and thoughtful BOUNDARIES that guide your daily decisions and interactions. Start by setting a consistent bedtime of 10 o’clock, which will not only help you get adequate rest but also improve your overall focus and productivity during the day. Additionally, consider reducing the frequency of dining out, as this can not only save you money but also enable you to make healthier food choices that align with your objectives. Furthermore, take the opportunity to evaluate your friendships based on how they positively or negatively impact your self-esteem and mental well-being. Surrounding yourself with supportive and uplifting individuals will reinforce your commitment to your goals and empower you to stay on track towards achieving them.

Sounds easy, right?   Oh yeah and then there is the process of getting it into practice, making it a new habit, creating new neuropathways in the brain.  It’s a try it out, reconfigure, try it again type process, until you find the groove that works best for you and sticks so it becomes a rinse and repeat process.

That’s why I recommend a coach, someone to help you navigate

Featured

Sharing the Truths that Helped Me Heal

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Why do I share my truths?

Because, for the first time in a long time, I feel like I finally get it.
Life is hard.
We all have life lessons, whether they are big or small, that change us. They make us rethink what we believe, how we show up, and what we might do differently the next time.
I’ve had my share of unhealthy relationships, relationships with little communication, lots of control, and old beliefs I was following without even realizing it. Eventually, I reached a point where I no longer knew who I was.
They say people sometimes stay in unhealthy relationships because the familiar feels safer than the unknown. Even when the familiar hurts, at least you know what to expect.
I get it.
And I’m grateful that I’ve experienced healthy relationships since then. But healthy doesn’t mean perfect, and it doesn’t always mean forever.
One of the hardest and most humbling things I’ve ever done was end my first marriage after 8½ years together. When I left that relationship, I also lost a stepson I loved. In many ways, I felt like I had lost myself, too.
I had become an over-glorified housekeeper, cook, errand runner, and laundry maid. I felt overwhelmed, frustrated, and deeply underappreciated.
When I finally left, I shut down.
I felt like a quitter. And honestly, it completely sucked.
I didn’t believe in divorce, but I also couldn’t unhear or undo the things that had torn the relationship apart. I couldn’t go back to pretending I didn’t know what I knew.
Several months later, life became quieter.
I spent time with a dear friend who was battling cancer. I rescued a puppy. Little by little, I started living again.
And somewhere along the way, I let go of the belief that I had to have everything together all the time. I didn’t have to put on a brave face or pretend I was okay.
I could simply be human.
I felt broken, with all my cracks showing. It was terrifying.
And it was freeing.
So why do I share this?
Because I know there is someone out there experiencing something similar.
Someone who has been made to feel small or powerless. Someone who has reached their limit but is terrified of what comes next.
If that’s you, please know this:
You don’t have to have the whole path figured out before you take the next step.
Surround yourself with people who are kind, loving, and able to see you for who you really are. Create boundaries that protect you from returning to the same patterns. Give yourself permission to learn from what happened instead of allowing it to define you.
And, perhaps most importantly, learn to love yourself enough to stop abandoning yourself just to keep someone else comfortable.
Sometimes healing doesn’t look like having it all together.
Sometimes it looks like finally letting yourself be seen, cracks and all.